Hate is a sin?

[TheGuyWithAHeadache]

As a disclaimer, I don't want this to be percieved as bashing the Lord. I am simply angry and confused. With that said, let me explain my situation

My cousin moved in with my Aunt and I about a year ago. We've grown close since then, discussing our problems, looking out for each other, etc. She's like a sister to me. A few months ago she met a guy I will call "D" in this post. The relationship was going well for awhile, she seemed truely happy. Then D took up his old drinking habits. One day he snapped and beat her until she got a black eye. He even threatened her with a gun. Unbeknownst to me, he had done this before, even doing it in front of her six year old kid. The judge gave him one month in jail, a slap on the wrist. Now that he's out of jail, she's taken him back in. That's right, that low life is under the same roof as me. This is allowed by the law as she didn't and never will file a restraining order against him. I hate him. Nothing would make me happier than to do the same things to him as he did to her. As a law abiding citizen, I can't. People have told me that hating this man is a sin, that leaves me with some questions.

Why is this a sin? Does God condone this mans actions?
How am I supposed to forgive him if justice wasn't served in this situation?
Even if he hasn't hit her since, am I to forgive him?

Any thoughts on this would be appriciated.

[greentwiga]

Matt 18:21 refers to forgiveness without repentance, but look a few verses earlier. If he listens to you ... Now look at the related passage in Luke 17:4 There it clearly states, "if he repents."

In Luke 24:47, Jesus tells us and that repentance for forgiveness of sins would be proclaimed in His name to all the nations, beginning from Jerusalem. There are many similar verses.

[Wootah]

God hates evil - so you are feeling the right thing.
I am in a similar situation and my cousin knows she can flee back to her family.
We can't negate her sovereignty / foolishness in the matter.

[thepandemicson]

Matt 18:21 refers to forgiveness without repentance, but look a few verses earlier. If he listens to you ... Now look at the related passage in Luke 17:4 There it clearly states, "if he repents."

In Luke 24:47, Jesus tells us and that repentance for forgiveness of sins would be proclaimed in His name to all the nations, beginning from Jerusalem. There are many similar verses.

I'm looking at the KJV version at these verses just before the forgiving thy brother 7 times verse.

Matthew 18:15-20

"Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.16 But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.17 And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.18 Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.19 Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven.20 For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them."

This does not state that you should wait for him to repent. This is a suggestion that you should go to make peace with him or her. It seems to say that you will reap the rewards, or the consequences of you actions in making your peace or burning your bridges.

Although I can see it written here right before me, I have to say I don't like that mention of having your brother declared a heathen or publican should he disagree with what the church has to say about your brother's actions between yourselves. Declaring someone a heathen because they don't agree with you strikes me as very unchristian and unforgiving. This apparently gives anyone the say-so to decide that someone is undeserving of being saved based on what they might view as a transgression against themselves.

Luke 17:4

"Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him."

I can see what you're getting at here. This still doesn't strike me as part of Christ's personality which, until I read this, always struck me as 'turn the other cheek'. I still don't think that his ultimate message was to forgive only when repentance was offered. The New Testament is incredibly vast to simply boil down to a message of conditional forgiveness. I think the 'rebuke him' goes hand in hand with 'take heed to yourselves'; which is to say that you need to stay away from someone who has a habit of wronging you lest they continue to wrong you and think it's alright to do so. This is a message of self-protection. Forgive, but don't forget what this person is capable of.

Luke 24:47-48

"And that repentance and remission of sins should be preached in his name among all nations, beginning at Jerusalem.48 And ye are witnesses of these things."

I see the combination of repentance and remission of sins mentioned here. But it doesn't say that to be forgiven you have to repent. The only correlation I see with this verse in terms of repentance is Jesus encouraging people to repent for the wrong they may have committed. It doesn't mean they haven't or can't be forgiven if they haven't recognized or apologized for the wrongs they have committed.

I do not mean to say that one should not repent. I do think it's a good practice to look at the error of one's one ways. But you can forgive someone without them making amends or recognizing that they even have amends needing to be made. And I am positive that this is what the Christian God is trying to encourage.

Quotes are pulled from The New Bible.com

[thepandemicson]

Crud. Too late to edit now. I can see a few grammar errors in my most recent reply. I hope it's still legible