New User Introduction for ElCodeMonkey

[ElCodeMonkey]

Hey everyone. I'm obviously new to this forum and there's a LOT of stuff here. I couldn't begin to know where to start or to even contribute. I plan to raise a TON of things that could be discussed in just this little introduction.

A little about me... I used to be a completely obsessed-with-God Jesus Freak. I took the term "Jesus Freak" quite dearly and embraced it. I was leader of a praise band in Campus Crusade for Christ, leader of many different Bible Studies, and truly believed everything without the shadow of a doubt. There's obviously no way to "convince" anyone that I was "truly" Christian, but for arguments sake, let's just assume I was . I actually quit college in my Junior year to be a missionary. Things didn't work out and I went back to school a year and a half later and finished my degree in Computer Science.

I don't believe in God for many different reasons though I would absolutely love to believe in Him again. I remember the times being quite filled with joy, purpose, belonging, etc. The only problem now, is I'm far too convinced that everything you "feel" is not enough reason to believe. That was always the problem I had with other denominations (such as Mormonism). I would point out a glaring contradiction in the book of Mormon and their response was always, "Huh... I don't know... But I FEEL......" I'm not interested in feelings, I'm interested in facts. Feelings can be faked and you can even be fooled by yourself and your own feelings.

The logic of an all-loving God and an all-powerful God doesn't work in my mind. This is just one issue of many. I have a son. I love him. I would prevent a bully from poking his eyes out because I love him. If he had to say, "Daddy's a phony" to get out of it 'cause I wasn't there or something, I wouldn't hold it against him. But certainly if I'm all-knowing and all-powerful, I would prevent it from happening and I would feel no joy at all from him "sticking to his guns" and not denouncing me if it meant poking his eyes out.

I don't want to bore people so I'll stop there and anyone can comment on anything. Keep in mind that I am insanely open to anything so long as logical facts can make me believe. I am very learned in this area as I used to be huge into apologetics. So don't think for a second that it might be easy . I hope to have a good time discussing stuff without having a zealot know-it-all telling me that I'm an idiot, etc. Don't tell me how I think and feel. Only I know that. Thanks!

[ElCodeMonkey]

So how come I don't see my signature in the forums? Is it just because I'm me so it doesn't show, or is no one else seeing it either?

[Goat]

So how come I don't see my signature in the forums? Is it just because I'm me so it doesn't show, or is no one else seeing it either?

You can either click on 'attach signature' on each post, or go to the profile and
change the default to put the signature in there every time.

[ElCodeMonkey]

Ah. Thanks. I previously looked in the profile settings but didn't find it. There's too many tabs within tabs within tabs of settings to go through . I always forgot to look for an option when I posted too. All is good

[McCulloch]

Profile link
Profile tab
Profile Settings link on the Your profile tab
Posting Link
Always attach my signature Yes

You might find this interesting Quick BBCode Tutorial

BB Code

[wrekk]

Nice to meet you. I dabble a little into programming but not much. Some php, that's about it.

I too am interested in what set you on your journey to disbelief. Was it gradual?

[Confused]

From Jesus freak to Computer freak . Is that an improvement? (attempt at humor)

Your attempt at humor has succeeded in ommiting a chuckle from me . In many ways, I would quite believe that the transformation is indeed a positive one. I no longer look for the evil residing in everything. I can watch a movie without feeling condemnation breathing down the back of my neck, etc. It's a rather nice feeling

Now, the question is, can you listen to 'What if God were one of us' without freaking out?

Ok, I give. What is "What if God were one of us"? A poem, song, speech, what?

[Goat]

From Jesus freak to Computer freak . Is that an improvement? (attempt at humor)

Your attempt at humor has succeeded in ommiting a chuckle from me . In many ways, I would quite believe that the transformation is indeed a positive one. I no longer look for the evil residing in everything. I can watch a movie without feeling condemnation breathing down the back of my neck, etc. It's a rather nice feeling

Now, the question is, can you listen to 'What if God were one of us' without freaking out?

Ok, I give. What is "What if God were one of us"? A poem, song, speech, what?

It is a song by Joan Osborn.

[Fallibleone]

*freaks out*

[ElCodeMonkey]

Personally, I knew the one by Alanis Morissette, but they're probably the same .

Is there any one thing that started you to lose your faith? Or, was it a gradual change?

I too am interested in what set you on your journey to disbelief. Was it gradual?

I don't know how I miss these things sometimes... I guess I get too wrapped up in other topics or something.

But anyway, yes and no about being gradual. There comes a point where your brain no longer believes but your heart does. The brain was almost instantaneous after asking a few questions to myself that I didn't feel had adequate answers. The heart wanted to keep going and that took a while to kill. I just had to say it out loud that I no longer believed and the heart shriveled and died. Unfortunately, I haven't found anything to revive it which is kinda why I'd like to believe again. But my brain simply doesn't believe and there's not much I can do about it.

But the stuff that caused me to start doubting is a lot of the stuff I've mentioned on this forum elsewhere now. One being the fact that I cannot logically believe the Bible is 100% infallible when it obviously has SOME errors in it. I can't believe it's God's own words written through men as Paul obviously says it wasn't for at least a particular point in it. From those two things alone, yet with the church claiming that it's both, it makes it difficult to believe in the faith as well. It must have been made to control the people. Finally, just looking back at how I was as a Christian and how I see most every other Christian, it's not the kind of person I want to be. I feel I can be MUCH more loving as a non-Christian than I ever could have as a Christian. 'Cause now I don't find things "evil" which makes me much better of a person to talk to and I don't have to condemn people or the things they do. I can now be accountable to myself and they to themselves.

[Beto]

I honestly doubt many people actually believe in "God". We grow up hearing expressions like "God willing", "thank God", "God this", "God that", and growing up you really have no reason to question whether or not there's a god up there looking out for us. Does this constitute "belief"? I don't think so, it's taken for granted. It's only when you start hearing "thank God" when something pleasant happens or "God works in mysterious ways" when something nasty happens, that you start to realize how arbitrary "God's" whims are, and how "faith" serves no real purpose in the real world. It's a small step from there to realizing there's no good reason to believe in gods besides wishful thinking to snuff out our disparaging sense of mortality. Yes, many people believe in "belief" but only a handful believe in "God". Thank God for that... *doh*