I'm an atheist...and I think I losing my mind

[Qbert]

I've been a lurker for quite some time, but I'm moved to write about something.

I think I'm losing my mind and here's why:

I'm an atheist, or at the very least, and agnostic.

Lately, I've been having weird dreams and "occurances".

First, the dreams. In just the past few weeks, I've had the following dreams:

1. I was part of a contest to build the best ark (yes, the boat). I was pushing my ark around a park looking area to find a spot to park it for it to be judged. All around me were others with their arks. As I was pushing my ark to certain spots, an unseeable force was preventing me from parking my ark in any one spot. I could only easily move the ark towards a specific path, which was towards a mountainous area up hill. As I started getting closer to the mountains, the area was dense with trees and I knew that the trees would block my path. However, that was the only way for me to proceed. End of dream.

2. I was in a house that appeared to be a empty green house or shed with my cousin (who is a bible thumping christian by the way). Looking outside of the window, we could see strange happenings in the sky. In my heart, I knew it was the rapture and the only place safe at the moment for us, was inside the shed. My cousin wanted to leave because he felt he needed to be by his family when the end came. I insisted that god wanted us in the shed regardless of what we wanted for reasons unknown to us, yet he still proceeded to leave. End of dream (strange, as I am not a believer).

3. I had a dream that I was living back home with my mother and I was in my old room. I felt that there were demons in my bed that I could not see...scratch that...demons in my bed, blankets, pillows...everywhere. Funny thing, the demons did nothing and I could not see them. So if they did nothing, and everything was normal...why would I think demons were in them? I stood up in bed and started apologizing to god for not believing. My mouth was moving, but no sound was coming out. I started yelling at the top of my lungs and the more I yelled, the more silent I know I was. I was jumping in bed praying, apologizing and crying. I woke up with tears in my eyes, as I guess the dream tears carried over into real life.

4. Reserved space. I had another dream but cannot remember it.

"Occurances"
Only 2...but enough to question my sanity.

1. On the day after one of my dreams, I was blow drying my hair and the blow dryer was tugged at. That's it. Nothing major, but still something to make me wonder if I was going crazy.

2. I travel a lot for my job. On my last trip back home, I was in the plane sitting at a window seat. We were above cloud level. I was reading a book, and to rest my eyes, decided to look out the window. What I quickly saw was what appeared to be wide white house with columns lined around the front. The housed faded into the clouds and I did not spot it again.


So, is my mind playing tricks on me or what?

[MikeH]

Since you travel alot for your job, you may be suffering from fatigue, but I wouldn't totally count out spiritual occurrences. Get some rest, and a visit to the doctor for a physical wouldn't hurt either. Beyond that, there's no harm in exploring what you think might be the spiritual world. It seems like you maybe had a Christian upbringing, am I correct?

[Qbert]

Yep. I was raised a catholic, then became a soutern baptist leaning towards non-denominational up until about 2 years ago when I started simply not believing based on studies of religious origins.

[MikeH]

Yep. I was raised a catholic, then became a soutern baptist leaning towards non-denominational up until about 2 years ago when I started simply not believing based on studies of religious origins.

Well, as a believer I would not discount that it could be a real spiritual experience. If you are just having hallucinations, they might be conjured up by what you have learned in the past and are coming out in this way. A doctor can tell you if it is a physical thing. The main thing is not to freak out or jump to any conclusions, just be open to what might be happening. Try praying about it (while you're awake) if you like, and ask for answers. If it is some sort of message from God, there must be something good that's supposed to come out of it.

[Scrotum]

I've been a lurker for quite some time, but I'm moved to write about something.

I think I'm losing my mind and here's why:

I'm an atheist, or at the very least, and agnostic.

Lately, I've been having weird dreams and "occurances".

First, the dreams. In just the past few weeks, I've had the following dreams:

1. I was part of a contest to build the best ark (yes, the boat). I was pushing my ark around a park looking area to find a spot to park it for it to be judged. All around me were others with their arks. As I was pushing my ark to certain spots, an unseeable force was preventing me from parking my ark in any one spot. I could only easily move the ark towards a specific path, which was towards a mountainous area up hill. As I started getting closer to the mountains, the area was dense with trees and I knew that the trees would block my path. However, that was the only way for me to proceed. End of dream.

2. I was in a house that appeared to be a empty green house or shed with my cousin (who is a bible thumping christian by the way). Looking outside of the window, we could see strange happenings in the sky. In my heart, I knew it was the rapture and the only place safe at the moment for us, was inside the shed. My cousin wanted to leave because he felt he needed to be by his family when the end came. I insisted that god wanted us in the shed regardless of what we wanted for reasons unknown to us, yet he still proceeded to leave. End of dream (strange, as I am not a believer).

3. I had a dream that I was living back home with my mother and I was in my old room. I felt that there were demons in my bed that I could not see...scratch that...demons in my bed, blankets, pillows...everywhere. Funny thing, the demons did nothing and I could not see them. So if they did nothing, and everything was normal...why would I think demons were in them? I stood up in bed and started apologizing to god for not believing. My mouth was moving, but no sound was coming out. I started yelling at the top of my lungs and the more I yelled, the more silent I know I was. I was jumping in bed praying, apologizing and crying. I woke up with tears in my eyes, as I guess the dream tears carried over into real life.

4. Reserved space. I had another dream but cannot remember it.

"Occurances"
Only 2...but enough to question my sanity.

1. On the day after one of my dreams, I was blow drying my hair and the blow dryer was tugged at. That's it. Nothing major, but still something to make me wonder if I was going crazy.

2. I travel a lot for my job. On my last trip back home, I was in the plane sitting at a window seat. We were above cloud level. I was reading a book, and to rest my eyes, decided to look out the window. What I quickly saw was what appeared to be wide white house with columns lined around the front. The housed faded into the clouds and I did not spot it again.


So, is my mind playing tricks on me or what?

Yes Qbert ,it is clearly the Christian God showing you the way.

Now, just make sure you never travel to a country that have another culture or religion, and you will be fine. Jesus will save you, and Science is Evil(tm) !!!

Hail Jesus.



Or perhaps you are just tired, and your religous upbrining (indoctrination) is still with you somewhat?

[Zzyzx]

.
How would you describe the stress in your life? Are you "over-busy" with professional and personal obligations? Do you have adequate time off from responsibilities to "recharge" and to maintain sanity? Are there plenty of non-commercial rewards in life?

Having "mental experiences" might indicate many different conditions. Some would attribute them to "gods", others would blame "evil spirits" or voodoo, still others might find evidence of "Leprechaun influence". There may also be medical implications that could be checked.

Religious indoctrination can be very difficult to eradicate completely, particularly religions that rely heavily upon guilt and fear (most) to obtain and retain contributing members (as a path to influence and income). Catholicism is a guilt-heavy and fear-heavy religion (personal experience)

[Bemuse]

Hi, my first post here on the forums.

Just wanted to let you know that if you continue to feel the guilt and fear that you were raised to believe it could very well have a negative affect on your health.

While your dreams are interesting, they don't seem to me to be anything out of the realms of what dreams typically are. If you realize that dreams are nothing more than images, voices, experiences, sounds, all being put together by a mind with no one to control it. All the things you experience are turned over to your mind to do with what it wants while you are asleep. That is not to say that dreams don't contain emotion. Your mind, whether or not you are in control of it at the time is well aware of what guilt is, fear is, happiness is....etc. So dreams do somewhat reflect your emotional experiences in your waking life. But none of this is any cause to give spiritual credit to what you dream. I have had some pretty crazy dreams but I have never thought of them as being anything other than just that, dreams.

As far as tugs on blow dryer cords and such, I always have to look for a logical explanation as to why this may have happened. Of course I was not there but I would imagine there are many things around you while you are waving the blow dryer back and forth that a dangling cord might get momentarily snagged on.....But like I said, I was not there.

As far as the white house in the clouds with the columns lined around the front, what do you think it could have been? There is a reason this "quickly" happened. There was never a white house in the clouds....

As far as any of these things being some sort of message from God...I would hope he could do a better job than tugging on cords and making momentary cloud structures.

It sounds to me like there may be something in your life that is causing you a great deal of stress and that you should probably take a break and try to unwind.

But hey, what do I know.