*THE VAST HOMOSEXUAL CONSPIRACY*

[The Persnickety Platypus]

This is it. The day of reckoning.

There is no doubt. No more fooling ourselves. A haunting specter has arisen. It's broad hand casts a shadow over our societies most hallowed institutions, and will advert it's force at nothing short of it's ultimate goal:

WORLD DOMINATION


Religious Conservatives have been warning us for years. They have fought countless foes in the perpetration of their noble message (evidence, logic, facts, reason), yet bravely continue their plight of truth. Dauntless and enduring, their message miraculously survives today, even despite the hoards of autocratic homosexual liberal communist abortionists currently controlling our society.

Beware of Liberals; do not succumb to their evil agenda! They will try to smooth talk you, catch you off guard, lead you astray. They will inquire as to why "so called moral Christians" are not concerned with the "real" matters plaquing our world; global poverty, insufficient health care, the energy crisis, global warming, the national debt, inflation, malnutrition, natural disasters, plaque. What they do not realize is that it is the dreaded HOMOSEXUALS who are perpetrating all these ailments!!! It's True!!!

Homosexuals are stealing food from the hungry!!!
Homosexuals are injecting people with illnesses and stealing the government subsidised funds aimed at curing them!!!
Homosexuals are using up all our oil!!!
Homosexuals are melting to polar ice caps, causing sea levels to rise!!!
Homosexuals are responsible for the uncompensated government spending!!! They blackmailed Reagan into starting it, and are doing the same to Bush!!!
Homosexuals are warming the seas and sprinkling magical hurricane dust into the atmosphere!!! They created all the hurricanes last year, and are planning even more this year!!!
Wondering why your dollar isn't worth as much nowadays? Homosexuals!!!
Homosexuals have hi-jacked our education system!!! They are conducting new anal sex classes, and indocrinating our innocent children to their evil ways!!!
Homosexuals eat kittens!!!
Homosexuals seek to destroy the institution of marriage!!! Once gaining ultimate political power, they will decree that all couples separate and choose new same-sex partners!!!
Homosexuals order thousands of babies to be aborted every year against the mother and father's will!!!
Homosexuals are currently in the process of BANNING CHRISTIANITY!!! Don't be mislead by the fact that 98% of our elected leaders are professed Christians!!! Liberal lies!!!



Time is waning! We must do something about these homosexuals, lest they destroy all we hold dear! Now that you are aware of the full extend of the homosexual agenda, you are probably wondering what you can do to join the resistance.

(1) First and foremost, you must sign the petition. Upon signing, you will be admitted to my underground gay/liberal/feminist/abortionist/evolutionist/humanist resistance movement dubbed F.A.G. (Fight Against Gays). Further instruction will follow.

1. The Persnickety Platypus
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
13.
14.
15.

Our official chant (to be used whenever faced with a particularly compelling pro-gay rights argument) is thus:

"Man+Woman good, Man+Man bad"

(Lyrics by George Orwell)


(2) To avoid indoctrination into the homosexual liberal communist feminist humanist evolutionist abortionist lesbian dogma, one must wear a string of garlic around his neck. (I am told that this also helps fend off vampires. How convenient!)


(3) One must make their social stance known. A few suggestions:

- Make all your posts on message boards related to homosexuality. Never talk about anything that actually matters. Start lots of anti-homo/liberal/evolutionist/feminist/abortionist/ect threads, but never present any actual arguments or evidence. Especially evidence. Evidence is for liberals.

- Loudly exclaim "Ewww that's gross" whenever homosexuality is mentioned in a public setting.

- Stage obnoxious protests outside military funerals. Hold up signs with slogans like "God hates fags" and "America is going to hell for tolerating gays". For more information, visit http://www.godhatesfags.com.




Now, let's get some intelligent discussion going. Questions for debate:

1. What other venues of society have the homosexuals infiltrated?
2. What else can we do to stop them?

[Felonious]

Yeah, alright, haven't read all the posts and replies and such, but

WHAT THE %&*$??

Gays aren't trying to outlaw Christianity.

Death, to Christians, would be considered a good thing, I mean, the sooner Heaven comes around, the better. (I'm a Christian, and I certantly want to get to Heavan sooner.)

I have seen way more straight folk beat up on gays than gays beat up straights.

I apologise if this was a joke thread (I sincerely hope it is) I also apologise if my post has been too rude or anything like that.

Another victim of the mind controlling homosexual lobby.


So sad.

You know, I was going to respond with an insult, a nasty, below the belt insult.

But I've had a change of heart.

I'm going to give you some advice.

I'f you're a Christian (I assume you are) or hell, even if you aren't a Christian, you should think about what your saying.

You know this isn't true, you know whatever sources you got this from is wrong. Take a little while to research it. I'm sure you'll learn of your error.

Don't be ashamed, we all make mistakes.

The biggest thing to remember is to love everyone, equally, and justly.

I hope you find the truth, brother. I hope one day, we can all just be one, happy family.

[WelshBoy]

Felonious,

He isn't a Christian and is making fun of the radical Christian position on homosexuality, don't worry.

Another victim of the mind controlling homosexual lobby.


So sad.

This is him playing the devil's advocate. Don't be offended.


Regards

Luke

[Cathar1950]

Felonious,

He isn't a Christian and is making fun of the radical Christian position on homosexuality, don't worry.

Another victim of the mind controlling homosexual lobby.


So sad.

This is him playing the devil's advocate. Don't be offended.


Regards

Luke

I thought TPP was being sarcastic and it made me chuckle.

[Greatest I Am]

Hi TPP

The flavour of your post reminds me of a gay who is fed up with our attitude towards gays and lesbians. This is not to say you are, it just has that flavour. If prevailing attitudes were different I could have excluded my second sentence.

All people are slowly recognizing gays for what they are. A very normal condition for any human being.

Gays need to remember that Christians read that our mandate according To God is to go and reproduce. Further they need to recognize that God was speaking to a people that was forgetting what sex was all about. People were moving to a belief that sex was OK with just about anything or anyone including our own children and slaves.
Christians then have no bell curve for normal sex. We are now moving to where there is a bell curve for sex and God and that gays happen to be at the extreme end of this curve and are just following their God given character or nature.
Take heart, it is taking a long time but Jesus's attitude is winning.

Regards
DL

[Goat]

Hi TPP

The flavour of your post reminds me of a gay who is fed up with our attitude towards gays and lesbians. This is not to say you are, it just has that flavour. If prevailing attitudes were different I could have excluded my second sentence.

All people are slowly recognizing gays for what they are. A very normal condition for any human being.

Gays need to remember that Christians read that our mandate according To God is to go and reproduce. Further they need to recognize that God was speaking to a people that was forgetting what sex was all about. People were moving to a belief that sex was OK with just about anything or anyone including our own children and slaves.
Christians then have no bell curve for normal sex. We are now moving to where there is a bell curve for sex and God and that gays happen to be at the extreme end of this curve and are just following their God given character or nature.
Take heart, it is taking a long time but Jesus's attitude is winning.

Regards
DL

YOu know.. we have already done that. The population of the world is more than we can sustain with the resources we have.. the non-replenishable resources are being depleted right now.

So, now what?

[Greatest I Am]

Take heart, the world knows how to take care of itself. It is man that is lagging behind. Not surprising. One thing we know about man is that he likes to be lead. We are working towards a world government and a world religion. These will go a long way towards solving our perceived problems.
As to natural consumables. We have yet to touch the surface.

Regards
DL.

[Goat]

Take heart, the world knows how to take care of itself. It is man that is lagging behind. Not surprising. One thing we know about man is that he likes to be lead. We are working towards a world government and a world religion. These will go a long way towards solving our perceived problems.
As to natural consumables. We have yet to touch the surface.

Regards
DL.

We have gotten far below the surface.

For example.. when it comes to the midwest and irrigation, water in the water table is refreshed at a rate of 1/2 inch a year, yet, every year, the farmers of the midwest withdraw 6 feet of water from the water table.

Simple math should tell you that can not go on forever.

[The Persnickety Platypus]

Yeah, alright, haven't read all the posts and replies and such, but

WHAT THE %&*$??

Gays aren't trying to outlaw Christianity.

Death, to Christians, would be considered a good thing, I mean, the sooner Heaven comes around, the better. (I'm a Christian, and I certantly want to get to Heavan sooner.)

I have seen way more straight folk beat up on gays than gays beat up straights.

I apologise if this was a joke thread (I sincerely hope it is) I also apologise if my post has been too rude or anything like that.

Another victim of the mind controlling homosexual lobby.


So sad.

There is a "mind controlling homosexual lobby"? Do you have an address?

Don't ask me! I do not mix with such company.

[Greatest I Am]

Take heart, the world knows how to take care of itself. It is man that is lagging behind. Not surprising. One thing we know about man is that he likes to be lead. We are working towards a world government and a world religion. These will go a long way towards solving our perceived problems.
As to natural consumables. We have yet to touch the surface.

Regards
DL.

We have gotten far below the surface.

For example.. when it comes to the mid-west and irrigation, water in the water table is refreshed at a rate of 1/2 inch a year, yet, every year, the farmers of the mid-west withdraw 6 feet of water from the water table.

Simple math should tell you that can not go on forever.

Think globally not locally. There are all kinds of untapped resources out there.
Remember the word of the Lord--there will be wars and rumors of wars etc...

Regards
DL

[Goat]

Take heart, the world knows how to take care of itself. It is man that is lagging behind. Not surprising. One thing we know about man is that he likes to be lead. We are working towards a world government and a world religion. These will go a long way towards solving our perceived problems.
As to natural consumables. We have yet to touch the surface.

Regards
DL.

We have gotten far below the surface.

For example.. when it comes to the mid-west and irrigation, water in the water table is refreshed at a rate of 1/2 inch a year, yet, every year, the farmers of the mid-west withdraw 6 feet of water from the water table.

Simple math should tell you that can not go on forever.

Think globally not locally. There are all kinds of untapped resources out there.
Remember the word of the Lord--there will be wars and rumors of wars etc...

Regards
DL

The 'untapped resources' are nearly as economical to aquire as you think.

The Word of the Lord is that man should be a steward over the land, and man is failing miserably at that.