Isn't the Platinum Rule better than the Golden Rule?

[Compassionist]

Platinum Rule: Treat others as they would like to be treated.

Golden Rule: Treat others as you would like to be treated.

I think that the Platinum Rule is better than the Golden Rule. What do you think? I think it is much better to ask people how they would like to be treated and if possible, treat them that way. Obviously, if everyone wanted me to give them zillions of pounds I sure couldn't afford it. Unless of course, I acquired omnipotence!

Also, I think that true objectivity is impossible. Sentience is, by its very nature, subjective and biased. In the same vein, true empathy is also impossible. Only I know what it is like to be me and only you know what it is like to be you. The best we can do is make reasonable guesses based on our biased and limited perceptions. I did say that I am a Strong Agnostic about the true nature of reality! What do you think?

[McCulloch]

On a deep level, the two rules are the same. I would like to be treated as I would like to be treated. I assume that you would like to be treated as you would like to be treated. Therefore, if I were to treat you as I would like to be treated, I would treat you as you would like to be treated. Right?

[Compassionist]

On a deep level, the two rules are the same. I would like to be treated as I would like to be treated. I assume that you would like to be treated as you would like to be treated. Therefore, if I were to treat you as I would like to be treated, I would treat you as you would like to be treated. Right?

I see your point. Thank you.

[OnceConvinced]

I voted yes.

The whole "Treat others as you'd like to be treated" rule shows us a great illustration of how the bible is written by man, not God. The bible seems to have a "mindset" that all humans are the same, ie, that the bible is good enough for everyone, everyone has been given enough evidence of God's existance, everyone should be able to live by faith, etc etc.

Any God would know (because he supposedly created us) that everyone is different. We all see things differently, We all have different ideas about how we should treat others based on how we like to be treated. If God had inspired the bible he would understand the differences and known that if we treat others as we want to be treated that we're never going to make everybody happy. We are going to do things that others DON'T like and we will have failed relationships because of it.

eg I hate saying "I love you" every day to a woman. To me it becomes meaningless words (much like saying grace before meals). I prefer to say them once every now and then in a meaningful way. I did not want to be told "I love you" every day. To me it was just words and it force me to return "just words". However my ex wife needed to be told regularly and it needed it to be a habitual thing. Sometimes I had her concerned because I didn't say it enough.

Everyone is different and we have to learn to meet other's needs on their terms, not just our own.

The Platinum rule would be more likely be the rule that an all-knowing omniscient deity would promote, not the obviously "tunnel vision" Golden rule.

[cnorman18]

I'm with McCulloch here; since the only person whose wants one actually knows is oneself, one is more or less constrained to extrapolate from that and do the best one can - either that, or spend one's life conducting interviews.
I don't think either rule is universally applicable, anyway. For example, I suppose that if I were breaking into a stranger's home in the middle of the night, I would want to be left alone to steal what I wanted without interference; but when that happened to me, it never occurred to me to apply that rule. Fortunately for them, the two guys that I heard in my house at 3 AM fled before I shot them, which I would have done with a perfectly clear conscience.

In any case, the real world being what it is, it's that other golden rule that seems to have the most impact. You know the one: "Whoever has the gold, makes the rules." Again unfortunate, but too often true.

For the record, I tend to say "I love you" rather frequently, and mean it. Maybe I say it too much; I don't care. I say what I feel. In at least one case, though, that would have been "Freeze, M-----F-----."

[Compassionist]

I voted yes.

The whole "Treat others as you'd like to be treated" rule shows us a great illustration of how the bible is written by man, not God. The bible seems to have a "mindset" that all humans are the same, ie, that the bible is good enough for everyone, everyone has been given enough evidence of God's existance, everyone should be able to live by faith, etc etc.

Any God would know (because he supposedly created us) that everyone is different. We all see things differently, We all have different ideas about how we should treat others based on how we like to be treated. If God had inspired the bible he would understand the differences and known that if we treat others as we want to be treated that we're never going to make everybody happy. We are going to do things that others DON'T like and we will have failed relationships because of it.

eg I hate saying "I love you" every day to a woman. To me it becomes meaningless words (much like saying grace before meals). I prefer to say them once every now and then in a meaningful way. I did not want to be told "I love you" every day. To me it was just words and it force me to return "just words". However my ex wife needed to be told regularly and it needed it to be a habitual thing. Sometimes I had her concerned because I didn't say it enough.

Everyone is different and we have to learn to meet other's needs on their terms, not just our own.

The Platinum rule would be more likely be the rule that an all-knowing omniscient deity would promote, not the obviously "tunnel vision" Golden rule.

Thank you. I agree with you.

[Compassionist]

I'm with McCulloch here; since the only person whose wants one actually knows is oneself, one is more or less constrained to extrapolate from that and do the best one can - either that, or spend one's life conducting interviews.
I don't think either rule is universally applicable, anyway. For example, I suppose that if I were breaking into a stranger's home in the middle of the night, I would want to be left alone to steal what I wanted without interference; but when that happened to me, it never occurred to me to apply that rule. Fortunately for them, the two guys that I heard in my house at 3 AM fled before I shot them, which I would have done with a perfectly clear conscience.

In any case, the real world being what it is, it's that other golden rule that seems to have the most impact. You know the one: "Whoever has the gold, makes the rules." Again unfortunate, but too often true.

For the record, I tend to say "I love you" rather frequently, and mean it. Maybe I say it too much; I don't care. I say what I feel. In at least one case, though, that would have been "Freeze, M-----F-----."

"Whoever has the gold, makes the rules." made me laugh because it's often the case. I would say, "Whoever has the power, makes the rules." Power doesn't just come from wealth, it also comes from connections, health, information, skills and technology. I am not advocating blindly following the Platinum Rule when others are not following the Platinum Rule towards you. Ultimately, life is a balancing act where competing interests need to be balanced. Of course, if you have enough power, you can get away with anything - as demonstrated in history, time and time again.

[OnceConvinced]

I'm with McCulloch here; since the only person whose wants one actually knows is oneself, one is more or less constrained to extrapolate from that and do the best one can - either that, or spend one's life conducting interviews.

Yeah, the platinum rule would definitely be a problem when it comes to total straingers.

I believe studying personality types is enormously helpful though when it comes to acquantances.

I was thinking about the golden rule a couple of nights ago. I was thinking how much I'd love it if a gorgeous naked women I'd never seen before, jumped on me and forced herself on me. However if I applied that golden rule in this case, I'd end up in jail.

[Compassionist]

I'm with McCulloch here; since the only person whose wants one actually knows is oneself, one is more or less constrained to extrapolate from that and do the best one can - either that, or spend one's life conducting interviews.

Yeah, the platinum rule would definitely be a problem when it comes to total straingers.

I believe studying personality types is enormously helpful though when it comes to acquantances.

I was thinking about the golden rule a couple of nights ago. I was thinking how much I'd love it if a gorgeous naked women I'd never seen before, jumped on me and forced herself on me. However if I applied that golden rule in this case, I'd end up in jail.

Thanks for making me laugh! I think one has to balance various variables rather than be absolutist and rigid. Life is a balancing act. Isn't a sadist a masochist practising the Golden Rule?

[SATCHMO]

Treating someone as they would like to be treated evokes a spirit of accommodation, while treating someone as you would like to be treated evokes a spirit of compassion.

I think it can also be agreed upon that while inquiring as to how someone prefers to be treated is a lofty goal, it is highly impractical and awkward in most interpersonal scenarios.

Asking myself how I would like to be treated in whatever respective situation I find myself in forces me to shift my thinking from an egocentric perspective to the perspective of the person I'm interacting with and thus has benefits for both myself and the person(s) in the situation.