I'm sure we could come up with a few more.8) Make up statistics.
10) Accuse them of persecuting you.
11) Bring up arguments that make no sense whatsoever; criticze their response with "You're just not making sense."
14) Post inane arguments on the Internet, and never follow up on them.
21) After losing the argument say, "I pity you."
22) Accuse them of willfully ignoring the "obvious truth."
23) Use bad math to back up your claims.
27) Call him a meanie.
34) Use Latin a lot.
35) Maintain that the King James Version is THE Bible; ignore questions as to who was saved prior to 1611.
40) Repeat something over and over, as if that made it true.
41) Repeat something over and over, as if that made it true.
42) Repeat something over and over, as if that made it true.
55) Punch him in the face. Hard.
56) When asked to prove a statement you made, say that you already proved it.
67) Knock on his door at 9:00 in the morning and offer him a pamphlet.
72) Name a bunch of smart [atheist] people.
73) ...and when he names a bunch of smart [Christian] people, call him stupid.
76) Burn him at the stake.
91) Misconstrue logical terms in order to prove that logic does not work.
94) Support your ludicrous contentions with "Most scholars agree that..."
95) Use only circular reasoning.
96) Claim that the [Christian] only uses circular reasoning.
97) Claim that circular reasoning is legitimate due to circular reasoning being legitimate.
101) Upon hearing that he is a [Christian], jump back reflexively, as if you don't want to catch whatever it is he's got.
102) ...then look at him as if he were a diseased leper who just spit in your eye.
105) When he takes the time and trouble to explain where your analogy or interpretation is at fault, begin your response with a sigh, so he'll know how patient you're being.
124) Say that [Creation] is not proven -- therefore the [Theory of Evolution] is correct.
125) Tell him it's his responsibility to prove that God [does] exist.
128) Deny that his child looks like him.
152) After your argument has been effectively refuted, wait a few days and then repeapt the argument, adding, "You still haven't addressed this."
155) Use the word "presupposition" incorrectly, repeatedly.
156) Argue the most insignificant point you can think of; when he doesn't address your pettiness, claim victory.
158) Argue that the translation "errors" in the KJV were actually God-inspired improvements, and therefore the KJV is the most accurate of all trnslations.
175) Make him clean out your car.
184) Insist that homosexuality is [not] a choice.
185) Insist that Thomas Jefferson was a Christian.
206) When losing a debate, take advantage of his good nature by punching out somebody near you until he stops talking.
211) Fail to have a basic grasp of history. (Spanish Inquisition? What's that?)
213) When all else fails, never talk to him, and convince a lot of other people to never talk to him either.
216) Send the DEA an anonymous tip that he has bundles of cocaine in his garage.
225) Accuse him of closed-mindedness for not accepting your extraordinary claims.
227) Tell him he is innumerate.
228) Tell him he is illiterate.
232) Insist that you've already refuted everything he said.
237) Create hoaxes to prove [evolution] (i.e. [Piltdown man]).
240) Turn up your amps so that everyone within three blocks has to listen to him rant . . . .
244) Grossly misunderstand the word "theory."
249) Declare that [Christianity] gives you nothing to hope for except the false promises of [the next] world.
257) Show up on his front porch at 9:00 on Saturday morning, and take advantage of his groginess by shoving copies of Watchtower into his hands and getting him to read the Bible with you, then walk away before he has any idea what's going on.
259) When confronted with a sound logical argument, respond with "Yes, but I don't believe that."
262) Scrape your fingernails on a blackboard.
263) If you're an ISP, repeatedly cut him off during a net session, so that he must spend 90% of his time dialing.
264) Program your [radio] to play very loudly at really odd hours.
265) Every time the subject of his being an [Christian] comes up, burst out laughing.
267) Accuse him of having more than one personality.
275) Reply to every statement he makes, "That's only your opinion."
276) Post something inflammatory about him, wait for him to respond, then go back and either delete or edit your post so that it appears that the [Christian] is attacking you for no reason.
277) Become completely and totally paranoid about him.
278) After bringing up a number of topics, explain your lack of response by referring to some organized sport that you participate in.
Hannah Joy
